Whatever you believe the report does exist. An illness was sweeping across BS5 over the last week, cup fever was everywhere. Every man, woman, and child were talking about the derby. No, not Rovers vs City, not El Classico, it was the local cup game between The Lion and The Stillage that was infecting the people. They turned up with a swagger that comes from being near the top of Div 3, and we wanted to let them know there is nothing between us, well…except about 20 places in the league, but other than that, nothing.
First out of the blocks was Phil, by his own slurred request, and boy was it a right call. The game took ages, but unlike the usual tactical masterclass, this was an advert for BPL and the quality entertainment it provides on Wednesday nights! It was a great start from 2 pint Phil, showing a new approach, quickly throwing up his V.A.G.I.N.A system, and getting down to it. Scintillating stuff. After being given 2 shots, 2 pint Phil was brimming with confidence, so he took aim at a Hollywood double. This caused the crowd, but mainly the ref, to turn into a poor man’s Michael Flatley. But 2 pint Phil didn’t flinch, he knows what’s what, and took the frame to make it 1-0.
They took the next 3 frames in razor thin fashion, so it was up to me to try and bring it back. This frame reminded me of a famous lie told to children about a hare and a tortoise. I started the race quick, potting the majority of my colours in one visit. Then after some chess moves, one total call even required the old white being used as a guide, really professional refereeing mind, I was given a chance to end it. Instead, I rattled the black. As the story goes, the tortoise slowly brought it back with some silky play, but a poor positional shot on the black left him a decision. This is why a tortoise will never win a race, Do you think tortoises know about cut breaks? What tortoise do you know that has 7 balled anyone? Exactly! They made the wrong decision and left the black over the pocket, and left what some would say was an unmissable pot, which I sank. Never in doubt. 2-3.
They took the next 2 to take the match 2-5 in a close fought game that shows we can mix it with anyone in all 4 divisions. It does mean more in house tournaments, so every cloud init.
Next fixture: 28/5 Home vs The New Old England
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